When people ask me which season is my favorite, I typically respond with, "Summer." However, there are several things I enjoy about autumn and one of those things is cooking more casseroles, soups, and crock pot meals. The problem is, I've been cooking the same casseroles and soups for years now and I don't have a great selection of crock pot recipes.
I collected several tasty crock pot recipes from Kim's blog last fall/winter, but I'm looking for more yummy, cool weather recipes. If anyone has any they would like to share, please send them my way. If you send me a recipe and it's a hit with my family, I'll be sharing that recipe in a future blog post.
Bon Appetite!!!!
Wednesday, September 23, 2009
Monday, September 21, 2009
More from JCICS
JCICS has issued another statement specifically regarding the video recently released.
Position Statement
The abusive practices portrayed in the ABC News (Australia) story are simply indefensible. Violations of the rights of children and families outrage all who hold an ethical conscience. If a picture is worth a thousand words, then images of children being recruited from existing
families is worth a million words of rage against corrupt practices, misguided efforts, unethical programs and illegal activities.
Joint Council has reported to the appropriate authorities and has, among other actions, initiated an aggressive review of possible violations of the Joint Council Standards of Practice by member organizations. Additionally, Joint Council will travel to Ethiopia on October 2, 2009. As appropriate, our findings will be reported publicly and to the authorities. (read more on Joint
Council’s activities related to Ethiopia.)
Those who are directly responsible for any illegal abuses must be investigated, arrested and prosecuted. Failing to take aggressive action against the individuals involved only further compromises children’s rights. And when the reaction to abuse is the elimination of a particular service (most often intercountry adoption) instead of prosecuting the perpetrators, children are
further victimized and their rights stripped away.
A critique of the ABC News story could easily point out inaccuracies and misrepresentations
beginning with a gross misstatement that over $100 million USD is provided to the Ethiopian government via intercountry adoption. But it is neither the time for such a critique nor the purpose of Joint Council’s current actions. At this moment, we must all be focused on supporting and sustaining the rights of children and families.
A subjective and narrow assessment of children’s services in Ethiopia discounts one of the primary needs and appropriate responses to an orphan crisis – the preservation of existing families. Without addressing this essential need, the orphan crisis will always be the shame of the world community.
Therefore, Joint Council calls on the world community to prosecute perpetrators,
conduct a balanced assessment of children’s services and to further develop
family preservation as a means of protecting families and their children.
http://www.jcics.org/Joint%20Council%20Summary%20Statement%20-%20Fly%20Away%20Children%20-%20Beyond%20The%20Truth.pdf
(Please click on the above link for more information from JCICS.)
JCICS truly takes this type of news seriously and I have no doubt they will do a thorough investigation. I wish we lived in a world where organizations such as JCICS weren't necessary, but the fact is, JCICS is necessary and it's unfortunate. However, APs and PAPs also have to do their part. As much as we might want to stick our heads in the sand and pretend that there is nothing unethical or corrupt happening in adoption, we can't. We also need to do our part. We need to do what is right.
Position Statement
The abusive practices portrayed in the ABC News (Australia) story are simply indefensible. Violations of the rights of children and families outrage all who hold an ethical conscience. If a picture is worth a thousand words, then images of children being recruited from existing
families is worth a million words of rage against corrupt practices, misguided efforts, unethical programs and illegal activities.
Joint Council has reported to the appropriate authorities and has, among other actions, initiated an aggressive review of possible violations of the Joint Council Standards of Practice by member organizations. Additionally, Joint Council will travel to Ethiopia on October 2, 2009. As appropriate, our findings will be reported publicly and to the authorities. (read more on Joint
Council’s activities related to Ethiopia.)
Those who are directly responsible for any illegal abuses must be investigated, arrested and prosecuted. Failing to take aggressive action against the individuals involved only further compromises children’s rights. And when the reaction to abuse is the elimination of a particular service (most often intercountry adoption) instead of prosecuting the perpetrators, children are
further victimized and their rights stripped away.
A critique of the ABC News story could easily point out inaccuracies and misrepresentations
beginning with a gross misstatement that over $100 million USD is provided to the Ethiopian government via intercountry adoption. But it is neither the time for such a critique nor the purpose of Joint Council’s current actions. At this moment, we must all be focused on supporting and sustaining the rights of children and families.
A subjective and narrow assessment of children’s services in Ethiopia discounts one of the primary needs and appropriate responses to an orphan crisis – the preservation of existing families. Without addressing this essential need, the orphan crisis will always be the shame of the world community.
Therefore, Joint Council calls on the world community to prosecute perpetrators,
conduct a balanced assessment of children’s services and to further develop
family preservation as a means of protecting families and their children.
http://www.jcics.org/Joint%20Council%20Summary%20Statement%20-%20Fly%20Away%20Children%20-%20Beyond%20The%20Truth.pdf
(Please click on the above link for more information from JCICS.)
JCICS truly takes this type of news seriously and I have no doubt they will do a thorough investigation. I wish we lived in a world where organizations such as JCICS weren't necessary, but the fact is, JCICS is necessary and it's unfortunate. However, APs and PAPs also have to do their part. As much as we might want to stick our heads in the sand and pretend that there is nothing unethical or corrupt happening in adoption, we can't. We also need to do our part. We need to do what is right.
Puzzle Master and Sickies
Lili was introduced to her first puzzle by her Aunt Susan and she has loved doing puzzles ever since. I was really impressed when she completed her first 12-piece puzzle several months ago. However, I think she's out done herself this time.
Here she is putting in one of the last few pieces of her US map puzzle.
This is a 50-piece puzzle, just completed by a not quite yet 2 1/2 year old. I think we'll start working on the names and capitals of each state next :-)
Dave came home from Seattle with a bad cold and not so very long ago he also commented on just how healthy Lili has been for the last 1 1/2 years. Guess who has had the sickies now for the last 4 days? Yep, Lili. Although she never acted like she felt sick the first 2 days, it was apparent she had some sort of bug. She would suddenly say, "Mommy, potty, potty, potty" and we would run to the bathroom making it just in time to avoid any soiled underpants (I assume everyone can figure out what I'm talking about here). She also wasn't eating very well the first 2 days. Then yesterday the runny nose started and she would feel warm one minute and the next minute she didn't feel warm at all. Last night she didn't sleep well and when I say she didn't sleep well I mean she was up for about 4 1/2 hours last night. Not crying, not upset, but also not sleeping. She's had a fever and her nose is constantly running, but she still doesn't act like she's really feeling bad and she is eating better today. She especially liked one part of her dinner tonight. 
The girl likes watermelon!
Other than being sick when we brought her home in March, 2008 and having a throat and ear infection about a week later, she truly has been healthy and we're very thankful for that.
Sunday, September 20, 2009
JCICS Response
The Joint Council on International Children's Services (JCICS) has apparently taken the information released in the Australian news video seriously. Here is the statement recently released by JCICS:
September 18, 2009 - Joint Council is well aware of the grave issues relating to intercountry adoption in Ethiopia. Earlier this week, Joint Council initiated an immediate assessment of any possible violations by Adoption Service Providers. Pending review Joint Council will issue a public statement. Any action taken by Joint Council, based on its findings, will be reported to the appropriate authorities.
September 18, 2009 - Joint Council is well aware of the grave issues relating to intercountry adoption in Ethiopia. Earlier this week, Joint Council initiated an immediate assessment of any possible violations by Adoption Service Providers. Pending review Joint Council will issue a public statement. Any action taken by Joint Council, based on its findings, will be reported to the appropriate authorities.
Friday, September 18, 2009
Time to Lighten it Up
This has been a heavy week of posting. When I mean heavy, I mean serious information and discussion. I don't know about the rest of you, but I can only handle so much of the serious stuff and felt it was time to get back to the fun stuff.
Dave was in Seattle this week on business, so Lili and I had a girls week. On Tuesday afternoon I had a hair appointment, which is typically my time for just me. However, with daddy gone, Lili went along. As I was taking her out of her car seat she started talking about getting her hair done and I had to inform her that only mommy was getting her hair done today. The crying started so I promised her I would make an appointment for her to come back to get 'her' hair done. This is quite a change from the little girl who not so very long ago cried every time she had to get a hair cut. Two days later we were back at the salon for Lili's turn getting her hair done. There were no tears and she actually sat still for the first 2 minutes. The entire appointment took maybe 6 minutes and by that point she was done, but she had her day at the salon. I really wish I would have taken my camera with me, because she was so proud having her own hair appointment and the look on her face when she first sat in the chair was priceless. However, I did try to take some pictures this morning and can honestly say, she wasn't into getting her picture taken this morning. I'll share them anyway.
Her hair used to cover the next line on her shirt. Obviously, we didn't cut a lot off, but enough to clean up the ends.
And here is another picture of Lili saying "see it" as I'm taking the picture.Have a great weekend everyone!
Thursday, September 17, 2009
In All Fairness
CWA issued a statement regarding the the article and video that was recently released. I feel that it is only fair to post this statement so both sides are represented.
Christian World Adoption Statement
September 16, 2009
As our staff watched the video made by an Australian network, and listened to the accusations, we felt very sad that so much of it was inaccurate and woven to make a story. This is not about someone’s network ratings; it is about many innocent lives and people who help children for the right reasons.
We will address some of the untruths below.
The lady called Michelle, who is shown in the video interviewing children to be adopted, was not a CWA staff person. She was an independent person who runs a ministry called Kingdom Kids, with her husband. Their ministry is to find loving homes for children that no one else would seek to adopt. These videos were not made at CWA orphanages but rather it was at the invitation of the Ethiopian regional officials that Michelle visited these areas to meet with the children who needed help.
Michelle is an adoptive mother of several older and special needs children, including older children from Ethiopia. Michelle and her husband even adopted a teenage girl whose original adoptive family would not keep her. They do not do this work for profit. In fact, Michelle wanted to do a lot of other humanitarian projects that were beyond the scope of our agency. CWA stopped working with her in May of 2007, but we find it very sad that she is portrayed as callous when their family has given so much to orphaned children. The practice of filming older and special needs children is used in the U.S. to find adoptive families. Information about waiting children is listed on the Internet by the Department of Social Services for potential families to review. This gives a child a voice and makes it possible to find the family who will love them and care for them. It is not a “sales pitch” and to insinuate that children are an item to be sold is disgusting.
The man interviewed named Eyob, who said he left CWA, did quit after he was held accountable for substandard work; it is not surprising that he would have an ax to grind, as he was quite angry about it. Eyob has started two orphanages of his own and is placing the children in intercountry adoption.
The CWA staff person, Aster, is a former Ethiopian judge. Her statement on camera is 100% correct – that the practice the “undercover couple” asked her about is illegal and that CWA does not participate in that.
There were several agencies discussed in this broadcast, including a revelation that over half of the seventy agencies they claimed are working there are not licensed. The truth is that EVERY agency working in Ethiopia is registered and licensed by the Ethiopian government. All must be an NGO and have approved project proposals that include helping the community. All adoption agencies may only work with children’s homes approved and licensed by the government. All must be audited annually and are relicensed every three years. CWA was targeted over and over; is this because we are a Christian organization? The entire film had a very anti-Christian stance.
There was also a lot of discussion about “orphan children” and the decisions made by Ethiopians with regrets later. If the network had done a little more homework, they would have discovered that the adoption process is a very long one and that the birth family must appear in court on two different occasions to be questioned. At any time, they can change their minds and keep the child. During our intake procedure, the social worker has a sheet, written in the native language that explains in detail the meaning of adoption and what the choices are. The birth family or guardian must understand and agree to the process before a child is accepted.
In the video, the adoptive mother states that her son calls the woman who found him “mama”. In fact when the family questioned their child’s status, CWA sent an investigator to the child’s village to interview the “mama” who brought him to the authorities. She took the investigator to the place where she found him when he was a baby. The orphanage said that he was abandoned – meaning by his original parents – and that was confirmed. The guardian also swore in court that all the information she had given was true.
It is very common in Ethiopia for the children to call their caregivers mama, and even our CWA staff is addressed as mother or mama when they visit from the United States. It is the cultural norm.
It is heartbreaking that there are 140 MILLION orphans in the world and that Ethiopia has 6 MILLION orphans according to the UN, but that is the reality. The reality of HIV, famine, malaria, war is causing children to be orphaned at an alarming rate. It is tragic and it is even more tragic that countries do not have the resources to care for their children. All countries are embarrassed by that, which is one of the reasons that it is becoming more difficult to help the children. Still, the countries who are brave enough to put the children first realize that a child needs a home and that the streets or an institution is the last place they should be.
Each adoption case is thoroughly investigated. CWA interviews people in the community to be sure that the facts we are getting about a child are as reliable as possible. For CWA to work as a licensed and accredited agency a very set procedure is followed. There are two courts that must approve a child’s adoption, both regional and federal. There must be a release approval through the local kebele for the child to be adoptable also, along with an investigation if there is any question regarding adoptability. The final review is completed by USCIS, which determines if the child’s adoption is valid and if that child qualifies as an orphan before a visa is issued and the child allowed into the U.S.
The quality of medical expertise and availability in Ethiopia is difficult and somewhat questionable. It is a third world country. Parents are told this several times, and asked to get additional opinions. The videos are made for parents to see potential conditions and health issues as well. It is recommended to all parents that these videos be sent to an international adoption specialist for further evaluation. CWA goes to great lengths to get the best available testing and information from the facilities there, including multiple testing for HIV, VDRL, and a broad spectrum of other blood work and sampling, which adoptive parents must review before a court hearing.
The claim that CWA broadly guarantees the health of any child does not stand up, as parents are educated throughout the process that this CANNOT be done. Parents are aware of this upfront as this is outlined in our legal agreement as well as in a very detailed Letter of Understanding that they sign upon becoming a CWA client. It is our hope that the family will not adopt a child without carefully consideration.
CWA goes to great lengths to help educate and prepare adoptive parents for the very conditions that are prevalent in the child’s birth country. Parents are strongly encouraged to consider all of the risks and to NOT adopt if they cannot cope with unknown medical or physiological issues.When parents are confronted with unknown medical conditions upon examining a child, they have every right to further the evaluation, and are not forced to accept any child. The woman interviewed in the broadcast made a decision to accept a child that she had grave concerns about, and when CWA offered to help find another family for this child, she wanted no part of it. The copies of the medical records given to the family have not been altered and have detailed blood work and examinations. It is very unfortunate that this little boy has more health issues than were detected in Ethiopia, but the American medical standards simply do not exist there.
Then there is the wild claim that the Ethiopian government is making $100,000,000. That is outrageous slander. The Ethiopian government refuses to take any money, period! The U.S. government charges adoptive families for its services, but the Ethiopian government does it all for free, and it is a burden on their court system to do so.
Then there are the broad brush charges that agencies are “harvesting” children there, and that the Christians are dodgy about answering questions. Surely using such emotional terminology may increase public outrage, but it is a disgusting reference to a very loving act. There is no need to “harvest” children. There are so many desperate children that even with 1,500 adoptions a year, nearly 6 million orphaned children in Ethiopia are left, struggling to survive.
Much of what is offered in the broadcast is flavored just enough to lead one to think that the Christian groups (assumed to be led by CWA) are misleading people. The doctor interviewed said that he did not remember this particular case. I seriously doubt that any doctor would remember a child that they looked at almost two years ago.
Agencies that are licensed, Hague-accredited and approved by both governments, and that have substantial humanitarian aid programs in Ethiopia, are doing a wonderful job of finding good, loving, permanent homes for children, who in many cases would just die in the streets. CWA sponsors hundreds of children in schools, and helps feed, medicate, and take care of many children who will never be adopted. Is this greed?
CWA has made the decision to help the older and special-needs children. It is more time-consuming, emotional and expensive to care for these children, but they have just as much right to protection and care and love as an infant.
We are appalled that this Australian network would take responsibility of defaming people who are trying to make a difference in the world, and more importantly are attempting to destroy the chances of so many little ones without a voice.
I do agree that the media puts a certain spin on a news story to make that story as 'news worthy' as possible. Let's face facts, we live in a society that feeds on hearing stories that create controversy. However, it still doesn't dismiss the fact that the woman in the video is in fact going to these villages and soliciting families to place their children for adoption. I have problems with this practice. This video certainly shed light on a situation that is stated to be illegal and hopefully it will have done enough to stop the practice of harvesting and create more over-sight in the process.
I also want to add that I do believe the majority of adoptions are handled ethically. I believe that the majority of agencies have a heart for children in need of a home and family. These agencies work very hard to make sure they are doing everything within the letter of the law. However, it's the actions of a few that cause adoptions to completely shut down and I really don't want to see Ethiopia become another Cambodia, Vietnam, Guatemala or numerous other countries that no longer have working adoption systems in place. Children truly in need, deserve better than that.
Christian World Adoption Statement
September 16, 2009
As our staff watched the video made by an Australian network, and listened to the accusations, we felt very sad that so much of it was inaccurate and woven to make a story. This is not about someone’s network ratings; it is about many innocent lives and people who help children for the right reasons.
We will address some of the untruths below.
The lady called Michelle, who is shown in the video interviewing children to be adopted, was not a CWA staff person. She was an independent person who runs a ministry called Kingdom Kids, with her husband. Their ministry is to find loving homes for children that no one else would seek to adopt. These videos were not made at CWA orphanages but rather it was at the invitation of the Ethiopian regional officials that Michelle visited these areas to meet with the children who needed help.
Michelle is an adoptive mother of several older and special needs children, including older children from Ethiopia. Michelle and her husband even adopted a teenage girl whose original adoptive family would not keep her. They do not do this work for profit. In fact, Michelle wanted to do a lot of other humanitarian projects that were beyond the scope of our agency. CWA stopped working with her in May of 2007, but we find it very sad that she is portrayed as callous when their family has given so much to orphaned children. The practice of filming older and special needs children is used in the U.S. to find adoptive families. Information about waiting children is listed on the Internet by the Department of Social Services for potential families to review. This gives a child a voice and makes it possible to find the family who will love them and care for them. It is not a “sales pitch” and to insinuate that children are an item to be sold is disgusting.
The man interviewed named Eyob, who said he left CWA, did quit after he was held accountable for substandard work; it is not surprising that he would have an ax to grind, as he was quite angry about it. Eyob has started two orphanages of his own and is placing the children in intercountry adoption.
The CWA staff person, Aster, is a former Ethiopian judge. Her statement on camera is 100% correct – that the practice the “undercover couple” asked her about is illegal and that CWA does not participate in that.
There were several agencies discussed in this broadcast, including a revelation that over half of the seventy agencies they claimed are working there are not licensed. The truth is that EVERY agency working in Ethiopia is registered and licensed by the Ethiopian government. All must be an NGO and have approved project proposals that include helping the community. All adoption agencies may only work with children’s homes approved and licensed by the government. All must be audited annually and are relicensed every three years. CWA was targeted over and over; is this because we are a Christian organization? The entire film had a very anti-Christian stance.
There was also a lot of discussion about “orphan children” and the decisions made by Ethiopians with regrets later. If the network had done a little more homework, they would have discovered that the adoption process is a very long one and that the birth family must appear in court on two different occasions to be questioned. At any time, they can change their minds and keep the child. During our intake procedure, the social worker has a sheet, written in the native language that explains in detail the meaning of adoption and what the choices are. The birth family or guardian must understand and agree to the process before a child is accepted.
In the video, the adoptive mother states that her son calls the woman who found him “mama”. In fact when the family questioned their child’s status, CWA sent an investigator to the child’s village to interview the “mama” who brought him to the authorities. She took the investigator to the place where she found him when he was a baby. The orphanage said that he was abandoned – meaning by his original parents – and that was confirmed. The guardian also swore in court that all the information she had given was true.
It is very common in Ethiopia for the children to call their caregivers mama, and even our CWA staff is addressed as mother or mama when they visit from the United States. It is the cultural norm.
It is heartbreaking that there are 140 MILLION orphans in the world and that Ethiopia has 6 MILLION orphans according to the UN, but that is the reality. The reality of HIV, famine, malaria, war is causing children to be orphaned at an alarming rate. It is tragic and it is even more tragic that countries do not have the resources to care for their children. All countries are embarrassed by that, which is one of the reasons that it is becoming more difficult to help the children. Still, the countries who are brave enough to put the children first realize that a child needs a home and that the streets or an institution is the last place they should be.
Each adoption case is thoroughly investigated. CWA interviews people in the community to be sure that the facts we are getting about a child are as reliable as possible. For CWA to work as a licensed and accredited agency a very set procedure is followed. There are two courts that must approve a child’s adoption, both regional and federal. There must be a release approval through the local kebele for the child to be adoptable also, along with an investigation if there is any question regarding adoptability. The final review is completed by USCIS, which determines if the child’s adoption is valid and if that child qualifies as an orphan before a visa is issued and the child allowed into the U.S.
The quality of medical expertise and availability in Ethiopia is difficult and somewhat questionable. It is a third world country. Parents are told this several times, and asked to get additional opinions. The videos are made for parents to see potential conditions and health issues as well. It is recommended to all parents that these videos be sent to an international adoption specialist for further evaluation. CWA goes to great lengths to get the best available testing and information from the facilities there, including multiple testing for HIV, VDRL, and a broad spectrum of other blood work and sampling, which adoptive parents must review before a court hearing.
The claim that CWA broadly guarantees the health of any child does not stand up, as parents are educated throughout the process that this CANNOT be done. Parents are aware of this upfront as this is outlined in our legal agreement as well as in a very detailed Letter of Understanding that they sign upon becoming a CWA client. It is our hope that the family will not adopt a child without carefully consideration.
CWA goes to great lengths to help educate and prepare adoptive parents for the very conditions that are prevalent in the child’s birth country. Parents are strongly encouraged to consider all of the risks and to NOT adopt if they cannot cope with unknown medical or physiological issues.When parents are confronted with unknown medical conditions upon examining a child, they have every right to further the evaluation, and are not forced to accept any child. The woman interviewed in the broadcast made a decision to accept a child that she had grave concerns about, and when CWA offered to help find another family for this child, she wanted no part of it. The copies of the medical records given to the family have not been altered and have detailed blood work and examinations. It is very unfortunate that this little boy has more health issues than were detected in Ethiopia, but the American medical standards simply do not exist there.
Then there is the wild claim that the Ethiopian government is making $100,000,000. That is outrageous slander. The Ethiopian government refuses to take any money, period! The U.S. government charges adoptive families for its services, but the Ethiopian government does it all for free, and it is a burden on their court system to do so.
Then there are the broad brush charges that agencies are “harvesting” children there, and that the Christians are dodgy about answering questions. Surely using such emotional terminology may increase public outrage, but it is a disgusting reference to a very loving act. There is no need to “harvest” children. There are so many desperate children that even with 1,500 adoptions a year, nearly 6 million orphaned children in Ethiopia are left, struggling to survive.
Much of what is offered in the broadcast is flavored just enough to lead one to think that the Christian groups (assumed to be led by CWA) are misleading people. The doctor interviewed said that he did not remember this particular case. I seriously doubt that any doctor would remember a child that they looked at almost two years ago.
Agencies that are licensed, Hague-accredited and approved by both governments, and that have substantial humanitarian aid programs in Ethiopia, are doing a wonderful job of finding good, loving, permanent homes for children, who in many cases would just die in the streets. CWA sponsors hundreds of children in schools, and helps feed, medicate, and take care of many children who will never be adopted. Is this greed?
CWA has made the decision to help the older and special-needs children. It is more time-consuming, emotional and expensive to care for these children, but they have just as much right to protection and care and love as an infant.
We are appalled that this Australian network would take responsibility of defaming people who are trying to make a difference in the world, and more importantly are attempting to destroy the chances of so many little ones without a voice.
I do agree that the media puts a certain spin on a news story to make that story as 'news worthy' as possible. Let's face facts, we live in a society that feeds on hearing stories that create controversy. However, it still doesn't dismiss the fact that the woman in the video is in fact going to these villages and soliciting families to place their children for adoption. I have problems with this practice. This video certainly shed light on a situation that is stated to be illegal and hopefully it will have done enough to stop the practice of harvesting and create more over-sight in the process.
I also want to add that I do believe the majority of adoptions are handled ethically. I believe that the majority of agencies have a heart for children in need of a home and family. These agencies work very hard to make sure they are doing everything within the letter of the law. However, it's the actions of a few that cause adoptions to completely shut down and I really don't want to see Ethiopia become another Cambodia, Vietnam, Guatemala or numerous other countries that no longer have working adoption systems in place. Children truly in need, deserve better than that.
Wednesday, September 16, 2009
Expecting Honesty and Ethical Practices
There is an article and video that is sweeping across the adoption community right now that I feel I need to share with everyone.
Please be aware that this video is not fun to watch.
watchhttp://www.abc.net.au/foreign/content/2009/s2686908.htm
Why would someone, who is in the process of adopting from Ethiopia, post such a video on her blog?
The answer is simple - to educate and make others aware that unethical practices in adoption do happen and are happening.
How many more countries have to shut their doors to IA? How many more children, truly in need of a family, have to be left in orphanages or living on the streets because some agency has decided that they need to go out and harvest children for adoption?
Okay, I'm not saying that Ethiopia is going to close her doors to IA. What I am saying is that we've seen similar things happen in many other countries. Some of those countries no longer have adoption programs in place. Orphanages are overflowing with children who may or may not ever become part of a family. Children are living on the streets. Babies are being found abandoned, some alive, some dead. It is so very, very sad to me that this is happening. Agencies know this and yet they still practice unethical behaviors that puts the entire system in jeopardy. That part of it makes me very angry.
How do I know that our agency is handling everything in an ethical manner? I don't know with 100% certainty that they are or are not. Yes, I did my research and I chose the agency based on that research. I have to hope and trust that they have and will continue to be ethical.
How do I know that the orphanage is handling everything in an ethical manner? Again, I don't know with 100% certainty that they are or are not.
What I do know with 100% certainty is that Ethiopia does in fact have millions of children who need families. What I have to trust is that Naomi comes to be part of our family in the most ethical way possible.
Adoption is a wonderful way to build a family and I encourage all AP's and PAP's to make sure that their agencies are practicing ethics in adoption. Our children deserve to know that they became part of our family the right way and should never have to question that.
Please be aware that this video is not fun to watch.
watchhttp://www.abc.net.au/foreign/content/2009/s2686908.htm
Why would someone, who is in the process of adopting from Ethiopia, post such a video on her blog?
The answer is simple - to educate and make others aware that unethical practices in adoption do happen and are happening.
How many more countries have to shut their doors to IA? How many more children, truly in need of a family, have to be left in orphanages or living on the streets because some agency has decided that they need to go out and harvest children for adoption?
Okay, I'm not saying that Ethiopia is going to close her doors to IA. What I am saying is that we've seen similar things happen in many other countries. Some of those countries no longer have adoption programs in place. Orphanages are overflowing with children who may or may not ever become part of a family. Children are living on the streets. Babies are being found abandoned, some alive, some dead. It is so very, very sad to me that this is happening. Agencies know this and yet they still practice unethical behaviors that puts the entire system in jeopardy. That part of it makes me very angry.
How do I know that our agency is handling everything in an ethical manner? I don't know with 100% certainty that they are or are not. Yes, I did my research and I chose the agency based on that research. I have to hope and trust that they have and will continue to be ethical.
How do I know that the orphanage is handling everything in an ethical manner? Again, I don't know with 100% certainty that they are or are not.
What I do know with 100% certainty is that Ethiopia does in fact have millions of children who need families. What I have to trust is that Naomi comes to be part of our family in the most ethical way possible.
Adoption is a wonderful way to build a family and I encourage all AP's and PAP's to make sure that their agencies are practicing ethics in adoption. Our children deserve to know that they became part of our family the right way and should never have to question that.
Monday, September 14, 2009
Hodge Podge
We had a very busy weekend. Friday night we went to a Latin American festival where we met up with some other Guat adoptive families. We had some good food, the kids did some fun crafts, we had wonderful company and we ended the night dancing to a great salsa band from Puerto Rico. This was the 3rd year Dave and I have attended the festival. The first year we were just a month from going to Guatemala to see Lili for the first time and dreaming of the day we would have her with us at the festival. The next year that dream came true and on Friday night we once again took our beautiful Guatemalan princess to enjoy some Latin American flare. This has become a family tradition and one we plan to continue in the future.
On Sunday we headed to a local park and met up with some other Ethiopian adoptive families. The kids had a great time playing and we enjoyed a nice pot luck dinner. Not only did I get to see some familiar faces, but I was finally able to meet a couple people that I have chatted with via email and forums. One of the ladies, Jennifer, is using the agency that our agency partners with, so our children will be coming from the same orphanage. We've traded emails several times over the past few months and I had a great time chatting and getting to know her better. One thing I learned in chatting with her is not only is it important for me to regularly keep putting new information on my blog, but it's also very important to include photos with my blog posts :-) So, I pulled out my camera tonight and took a couple pictures of Lili just for her. Hope you enjoy them Jennifer!!!!
Lili is really starting to enjoy having her picture taken and obviously she enjoys trying out different poses and facial expressions:-)Today was Ryan's official move-in date with the new agency. He was pretty happy on the drive and when we arrived to day training, he immediately went to his room, got out his favorite sensory box and made his way to a chair in his favorite corner of the room. He actually reminds me of a king sitting on his throne so he can see everyone who enters or leaves the room and can oversee everything going on around him. It's pretty funny really.
After dropping Ryan off at day training, Lili and I headed to Wal-Mart to pick up a few last minute items he was going to need and then took the rest of his personal belongings to his new home. I was actually more emotional than I expected to be. I'm so thrilled that he's in a good place, but at the same time having him 125 miles away from us is sad. What's most important is for him to be happy and successful. We feel a great deal of confidence that this new agency is going to help him find happiness and success, so the 125 mile difference will be well worth it.
With Ryan moved in and things beginning to settle down, I'm ready to focus on getting some things done around the house. I've really put a lot of things on the back burner over the last couple of months and need to start tackling some of those things. The office is in need of serious cleaning and organization; my entire house needs a good dusting from floor to ceiling and every where in between; the weeds have over taken my garden walkway and it's become very embarrassing; I have books that need to be taken down to the office and put on the shelves that Dave spent so much time building and hanging in the closet; of course I haven't even lifted a finger on Naomi's future room. The list just goes on and on and on.
Speaking of Naomi, I don't remember the last time I posted an update on our adoption. Our dossier arrived in Ethiopia 14 1/2 weeks ago or 3 months, 1 week and 4 days ago. Our official wait begins when our dossier is registered, but I've never been able to get a registration date from our agency, so I'm going by the date of arrival in country. We've been told for months that we should anticipate a 5-6 month wait, however, there are several families on our agency forum who have been waiting 6+ months now, so it's beginning to look like the wait times are increasing a bit. At this point, I'm really fine with a longer wait. We've had a lot going on recently and having a little more time to get things done at home and ready for our newest addition is okay right now. Our referral will happen when it happens and I'm going to try very hard not to stress over the wait. Now everyone has this blog post they can refer me back to when we hit the 5, 6 or 7 month mark and I'm stressing over our referral. LOL!!!!
One quick Lili story and then I'll close.
While eating dinner at the park yesterday, Lili tells me she has to go potty. So, we head to the bathroom where she proceeds to 'go potty.' We wash our hands and head back to the picnic area to finish our dinner and she announces to our table, "I poop." Just what everyone wants to know while eating dinner. Okay, she's 2 and she's proud of her bathroom moments. What more can I say?
I'm sure everyone is now thrilled that they continued to read this blog post to the very end :-)
Friday, September 11, 2009
Little Drummer Girl
One of Dave's co-workers had an extra Rock Band drum set that he gave to Dave yesterday. Dave set it up in the family room and it was quite a hit at our house last night. Please meet the next Sheila E . . . . .
Okay, I admit, she's not quite up to the standards of Sheila E yet (after all, she is holding one of the drumsticks upside-down), but she's on her way!!!!!
Now, completely off the subject of our little drummer girl, I'm always interested in reading books and articles about adoption, race, and different cultures. Today I came across a blog called 'Resist Racism' and found this post to be very interesting and thought provoking http://resistracism.wordpress.com/2009/09/08/a-surprise-to-white-people/. Please take a moment to read it and give me your thoughts.
Sunday, September 6, 2009
Many Faces of Lili
I have taken hundreds and hundreds and hundreds of pictures of Lili. My boys, not so many. Granted, if I would have had a digital camera and a computer 28 years ago, they too would have had hundreds and hundreds and hundreds of pictures. Needless-to-say, digital cameras and home computers were just not the norm that many years ago. Actually, it's pretty amazing to realize just how far we've come since I became a mom for the first time oh so many years ago. But I digress. I really do enjoy grabbing my camera and snapping photos. Although I really don't know how many of my blog friends actually enjoying seeing the pictures I post here, I enjoy sharing them and like knowing that I am keeping a chronological record of events that have happened in our lives.
A few days ago, Lili and I were having lunch and I couldn't remember the last time I got my camera out to take pictures. I broke out the camera and she had a great time giving me different facial expressions so I thought I'd share them with you. Here she is in all her cuteness!!!!!
Friday, September 4, 2009
Health Care Reform
I was able to do a little catch up on some blog reading today. Most of my blog reading, actually all my blog reading is other families who have adopted or are adopting. Even though many of these blogs are primarily adoption or children related posts, many touch on other subjects of interest. One family in particular are U.S. citizens living in Canada and they have a very interesting perspective on health care reform. Please take a moment to read their thoughts and opinions here.
Thursday, September 3, 2009
September 14th
This is the official date that Ryan will be moving in to the new agency. Yes, I'm happy to see a light at the end of the tunnel. No, I'm not yet feeling overly comfortable that things will go well. Yes, I think this agency is very capable of meeting Ryan's needs. No, I'm not yet feeling overly comfortable that things will go well. Yes, I think Ryan can be successful with this new agency. No, I'm not yet feeling overly comfortable that things will go well.
Let's just say that until we have more time under our belts and see regular improvement in how Ryan is handling all the changes, I'm not going to feel overly comfortable that things will go well. It's really difficult to have an agency that has been providing services for about 4 1/2 years announce that they are done providing those services to your child. I just keep thinking "it's happened once, so it can happen again." This new agency seems more competent and certainly has a much better understanding of the needs of an individual with autism, so I really want things to go well.
With that said, I don't think I've shared just how much this has had an affect on our life recently.
The obvious affect is just how much stress this has caused. We very quickly moved into over drive trying to find an agency that we felt was more than capable of not only handling Ryan's challenges, but meeting them head-on to make his life better and help him meet his full potential. The fact is, approximately 1 out of every 150 children are diagnosed with an autism spectrum disorder. Much more is known about autism now than when Ryan was young, but all the kids diagnosed with autism back in the early 80's and 90's have or are now entering adulthood. These adults need services and many agencies just haven't jumped on that band wagon. That leaves parents, such as us, in limbo and wondering what they will do. In addition, many state budgets are in a 'state of emergency' and they tend to pull money from funds providing services to those individuals who need it the most. The combination of just these two situations alone means that some agencies want to provide services to individuals who need the least amount of care. Ryan does not fall into the category of an 'individual who needs the least amount of care.' Quite the opposite. We weren't sure if there was an agency within the State of Illinois that would willingly take on the responsibility of Ryan. We questioned whether or not we would have to bring him back home to live with us. He needs full-time care and as much as we love him, we just are not in a position of providing the level of care that he requires.
While we were working hard to find the right agency for Ryan, we quickly came to the realization that all of this put our adoption plans in jeopardy. Until we were able to find another agency to provide services to him, there was no way we could bring another child into our home. Too much of our attention had to go into taking care of Ryan's needs and a new child in the family would also be in need of just as much attention. We had to actually say out loud, "If we get a referral today, we will have to turn it down." While other families were expressing their impatience over how long they've been waiting for their referrals, I was quietly hoping that ours would come later rather than sooner to give us more time to get the Ryan situation under control. However, we just weren't sure how long it was going to take or what it was going to take. On top of the stress and emotions of everything happening with Ryan, we didn't know if we could complete another adoption. Added stress and emotion.
Fast forward about 8 weeks and we've made great progress. We have been very pleased with how tirelessly the new agency has been working with Ryan and with us. We really cannot express how thankful we are to have found them. They have not only allowed him to come regularly for visits to their day training program and home, but have strongly encouraged that he come regularly for those visits. They have not been receiving a dime for any of this because all his funding has continued to go to the old agency. Yet, they recognized that his success was very much dependent on these visits. So, I loaded Lili in the van on a daily basis and began the 250 mile round trip to pick up Ryan and take him for his visits. Fortunately, we are to the point now that we aren't making the trip daily as he is staying there for more overnight visits, but we also know that we will need to continue making regular trips to help the agency while Ryan continues his transition. It is a process that will take time and despite the fact that I'm still not overly comfortable that things will go well, I am hopeful.
We began our adoption journey #2 on October 6, 2008 and 3 months ago tomorrow (Sept. 4th) our dossier arrived in Ethiopia. I had many moments of discouragement as we waited and waited for our completed home study and then waited for our USCIS approval. Now I'm thankful that we had all those delays. Our agency is still telling us that we will be waiting another 2-3 months for our referral and then another 4 months to travel on pick up. I never dreamed I would be thankful that we still have 6-7 months, but I am. Ryan needs to be successful. He deserves that success in his life and we need to do everything we can to help him achieve that success and reach his full potential in life.
Let's just say that until we have more time under our belts and see regular improvement in how Ryan is handling all the changes, I'm not going to feel overly comfortable that things will go well. It's really difficult to have an agency that has been providing services for about 4 1/2 years announce that they are done providing those services to your child. I just keep thinking "it's happened once, so it can happen again." This new agency seems more competent and certainly has a much better understanding of the needs of an individual with autism, so I really want things to go well.
With that said, I don't think I've shared just how much this has had an affect on our life recently.
The obvious affect is just how much stress this has caused. We very quickly moved into over drive trying to find an agency that we felt was more than capable of not only handling Ryan's challenges, but meeting them head-on to make his life better and help him meet his full potential. The fact is, approximately 1 out of every 150 children are diagnosed with an autism spectrum disorder. Much more is known about autism now than when Ryan was young, but all the kids diagnosed with autism back in the early 80's and 90's have or are now entering adulthood. These adults need services and many agencies just haven't jumped on that band wagon. That leaves parents, such as us, in limbo and wondering what they will do. In addition, many state budgets are in a 'state of emergency' and they tend to pull money from funds providing services to those individuals who need it the most. The combination of just these two situations alone means that some agencies want to provide services to individuals who need the least amount of care. Ryan does not fall into the category of an 'individual who needs the least amount of care.' Quite the opposite. We weren't sure if there was an agency within the State of Illinois that would willingly take on the responsibility of Ryan. We questioned whether or not we would have to bring him back home to live with us. He needs full-time care and as much as we love him, we just are not in a position of providing the level of care that he requires.
While we were working hard to find the right agency for Ryan, we quickly came to the realization that all of this put our adoption plans in jeopardy. Until we were able to find another agency to provide services to him, there was no way we could bring another child into our home. Too much of our attention had to go into taking care of Ryan's needs and a new child in the family would also be in need of just as much attention. We had to actually say out loud, "If we get a referral today, we will have to turn it down." While other families were expressing their impatience over how long they've been waiting for their referrals, I was quietly hoping that ours would come later rather than sooner to give us more time to get the Ryan situation under control. However, we just weren't sure how long it was going to take or what it was going to take. On top of the stress and emotions of everything happening with Ryan, we didn't know if we could complete another adoption. Added stress and emotion.
Fast forward about 8 weeks and we've made great progress. We have been very pleased with how tirelessly the new agency has been working with Ryan and with us. We really cannot express how thankful we are to have found them. They have not only allowed him to come regularly for visits to their day training program and home, but have strongly encouraged that he come regularly for those visits. They have not been receiving a dime for any of this because all his funding has continued to go to the old agency. Yet, they recognized that his success was very much dependent on these visits. So, I loaded Lili in the van on a daily basis and began the 250 mile round trip to pick up Ryan and take him for his visits. Fortunately, we are to the point now that we aren't making the trip daily as he is staying there for more overnight visits, but we also know that we will need to continue making regular trips to help the agency while Ryan continues his transition. It is a process that will take time and despite the fact that I'm still not overly comfortable that things will go well, I am hopeful.
We began our adoption journey #2 on October 6, 2008 and 3 months ago tomorrow (Sept. 4th) our dossier arrived in Ethiopia. I had many moments of discouragement as we waited and waited for our completed home study and then waited for our USCIS approval. Now I'm thankful that we had all those delays. Our agency is still telling us that we will be waiting another 2-3 months for our referral and then another 4 months to travel on pick up. I never dreamed I would be thankful that we still have 6-7 months, but I am. Ryan needs to be successful. He deserves that success in his life and we need to do everything we can to help him achieve that success and reach his full potential in life.
Tuesday, September 1, 2009
Funding
I know some of you are interested in how Ryan is doing and I wanted to share a quick update.
Toward the end of last week we got a pretty positive report. The supervisor from the day program told Dave that he is definitely doing better. They still have challenges with him, but he seems to be settling in a bit and the episodes of aggression have decreased.
We got a similar report from the house he'll be moving into and yesterday I was told by the house supervisor that he was actually walking around the house with a big smile on his face Friday afternoon. We haven't seen him smile much over the last couple of years, so that was really good to hear. Again, they are still having some challenges with him, but they are really working hard to find ways of making his life better. It's a nice change.
In order for Ryan to become an official client of the new agency, the state has to approve the switch of funding from the current agency. We received a letter in the mail yesterday stating that the funding switch has been approved. The new agency has to contact the state and provide them with some information, but once that has been done we are 'set to go.' I spoke with my contact at the new agency and we have decided that we will increase the visits this week and increase them again next with with an official move-in the following week.
While it's nice to finally see light at the end of the tunnel, I'm still having a difficult time feeling comfortable with everything. Having his current agency terminate services is still too fresh in my mind and I keep waiting for the new agency to tell us that it's not working out. Dave actually shared our concern that when they called us into the meeting a couple weeks ago, it was to tell us that it wasn't working out. They immediately responded, 'no.' I believe they understand that Ryan is going to need quite a bit of time to adjust, make changes, and settle in. However, I think I'm also going to need quite a bit of time to adjust, make changes, and settle in. If this experience has done nothing else, it's certainly caused Dave and I to become much stronger advocates for Ryan. Everyone better watch out now!!!!
Toward the end of last week we got a pretty positive report. The supervisor from the day program told Dave that he is definitely doing better. They still have challenges with him, but he seems to be settling in a bit and the episodes of aggression have decreased.
We got a similar report from the house he'll be moving into and yesterday I was told by the house supervisor that he was actually walking around the house with a big smile on his face Friday afternoon. We haven't seen him smile much over the last couple of years, so that was really good to hear. Again, they are still having some challenges with him, but they are really working hard to find ways of making his life better. It's a nice change.
In order for Ryan to become an official client of the new agency, the state has to approve the switch of funding from the current agency. We received a letter in the mail yesterday stating that the funding switch has been approved. The new agency has to contact the state and provide them with some information, but once that has been done we are 'set to go.' I spoke with my contact at the new agency and we have decided that we will increase the visits this week and increase them again next with with an official move-in the following week.
While it's nice to finally see light at the end of the tunnel, I'm still having a difficult time feeling comfortable with everything. Having his current agency terminate services is still too fresh in my mind and I keep waiting for the new agency to tell us that it's not working out. Dave actually shared our concern that when they called us into the meeting a couple weeks ago, it was to tell us that it wasn't working out. They immediately responded, 'no.' I believe they understand that Ryan is going to need quite a bit of time to adjust, make changes, and settle in. However, I think I'm also going to need quite a bit of time to adjust, make changes, and settle in. If this experience has done nothing else, it's certainly caused Dave and I to become much stronger advocates for Ryan. Everyone better watch out now!!!!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
